New At This (no duh!)

So why am I starting this? Call it an electronic diary of sorts. He won't find it so I'll be safe to write down everything. Shit, nobody will even read it; kinda like whispering secrets to a wall. I know if he did find it, he'd be hurt (and I would probably feel bad), but nothing would change. "I'm hurt, you do this and this and this..." blahblah But nothing would change. I've been out the last two Fridays with Karen and he stayed in bed the next day. Figured he stayed in bed before when I would come home straight after work. I think he figures that if I'm there, he can do whatever he wants cause "I have the kids." Take them to the park, the library, store...you name it. I can't remember the last time we went someplace as a family. But I know I planned it.

I look at my current book selection from our local library: "Conscious Divorce: Ending a Marriage With Integrity", "The Good Divorce", "The Everything Divorce Book", and my personal favorite, "Single Parenting for Dummies." All kept in a plain brown paper bag under the bed as if it were porn.

He fed Sean a Happy Meal. Which isn't bad, unless you consider Sean was sick and ended up throwing up all over his bed. Thought it was blood until I saw the onions.